“V,” “America’s Next Top Model,” “2010 NCAA Championship Game”



Tuesday 10pm, ABC

“V” was one of the most anticipated new shows of last fall—it had such good buzz, in fact, that ABC bumped it up from a mid-season premiere so that it could air the first four episodes before winter hiatus. That may have been a mistake. The general consensus is that while the remake of the 1980’s alien-invasion series started strong, it very quickly lost its way (much like ABC’s other much-hyped offering, “FlashForward”) and has squandered much of its potential and solid cast with episodes that lacked a pulse or direction. The suits have apparently gotten the memo, and here’s hoping that the show gets a little pep in its step for the rest of the season, because there’s lots of potential in this series, and even more gerbils that need eating.


“America’s Next Top Model” 

Wednesday 8pm, CW

When I first saw the photos of the girls selected for this season—the show’s 14th—I was appalled, and immediately declared them the Worst. Models. Ever. I stand by that. But while most of them may not have a prayer at successful modeling careers, after three episodes, I have decided that I secretly love these sad, nasty wretches. Exhibit A: Alasia, one of the least modelesque girls in the show’s history, who spends 85 percent of every episode either crying, screaming or throwing kitchen items at other girls. Exhibit B: Ren, the bohemian plant selected specifically by the show, who spent most of her time moaning about how she was too smart to be involved in something this dumb. Exhibit C: Angelea, who still looks like a hussy even after her makeover, and who really needs to shut up. A lot. I could go on. Seriously, terrible group, wildly entertaining.


2010 NCAA Championship Game 

Monday 9pm, CBS

As I know nothing about sports, I’ve never gotten into the whole March Madness thing. But I know lots of people do, so here, this is the game you’ve been waiting for, in which the country’s two top college basketball teams will go head to head. If, like me, you’d like to get into the bracket thing but not have to worry about boring, boring basketball, might I suggest Fug Madness, the annual terrible-celebrity-fashion contest currently going down on gofugyourself.com? I went in thinking Lady Gaga was a lock, but I think Courtney Love could go all the way this year…